Jason Keegan's Hell/Nirvana

My Dog Breed Nirvana!

2009-05-07T12:17:00.003+01:00

SO I collected a load of hair samples yesterday and one of the breeds that came back was a Golden Doodle! What a name for a dog!

Myself and Miiiiiichelle were thinking about our favorite dogs and decided it might be a good idea to cross them. My favorite at the moment are Pomeranians. I find them hilarious for some reason

Miiiichelle loves Chow Chows for other obvious reasons.

This is the only picture of a cross I could find but I reckon they could look alot funnier.

Miiiiichelle even came up with a great name for them. Pom Poms.
They gayest dog alive! We could make millions!

My HELL/Nirvana?

2009-03-31T16:47:00.002+01:00

To go or not to go?

MY NIRVAVA!

2009-03-25T14:18:00.001Z

So today on the way out of the apartment it was pointed out that the symbol in the elevator looked like a James Bond villain logo. In response:

See reflections on the water
more than darkness in the depths
see him surface in every shadow
on the wind I feel his breath

Goldeneye I found his weakness
Goldeneye he'll do what I please
Goldeneye no time for sweetness
but a bitter kiss will bring him to his knees

You'll never know how I watched you
from the shadows as a child
you'll never know how it feels to be the one
who's left behind
You'll never know the days, the nights,
the tears, the tears I've cried
but now my time has come
and time, time is not on your side

See home move through smoke and mirrors
feel his presence in the crowd
other girls they gather around him
if I had him I wouldn't let him out

Goldeneye not lace or leather
Golden chains take him to the spot
goldeneye I'll show him forever
it'll take forever to see
what I've got

You'll never know how I watched you
from the shadows as a child
you'll never know how it feels to be so close
and be denied
It's a gold and honey trap
I've got for you tonight
Revenge it's a kiss, this time I won't miss
now I've got you in my sight
With a Goldeneye, golden, goldeneye
with a goldeneye, goldeneye.

My Good Friday HELL!

2009-03-24T17:35:00.002Z

I HATE the CATHOLIC CHURCH!

So I'm having a bit of a nightmare organising an LGBT trip to Belfast. It took me ages to get my act together and when I finally cot everyones confirmation the hostel said that there was no space for some freakish reason the weekend we picked was a busy one. So I get my text group sorted, which was a nightmare, and text everybody. Then someone mentions that the weekend I had picked was Good Friday and that you can't buy drink on that day. Someone had told me that alcohol is available in the North then but we wanted to spend most of our time in the Kremlin so this date seemed pointless. I changed the date to the next week.

FUCK YOU CHURCH. I honestly feel personally offended that I can't preform my form of spiritual worship (dancing to music in a gay bar) whenever I want because some other religion says I can't drink. I really think they should remove all traces of the Churches influence over drinking laws and just have them 24/7.

Let the market dictate when they remain open and closed!

The other thing that gets me is believing in a non peer reviewed work form thousands of years ago but I suppose I wont get into that one.

My Betting HELL/Nirvana?

2009-03-18T16:11:00.002Z

So today I won a bet I had on with a fellow parasitologist.

She bet in December that I would do more than kiss a boy before her birthday which was today. I bet that I wouldn't and I didn't. So I win. I did kind of want to lose the bet but at least I've got €5 AND cleean sheets now!

Success...?

My Face Recognition Hell

2009-03-13T14:00:00.002Z

Today, I installed iLife '09 on my computer. I tagged my face and ran face recognition. The screen shot below is what I got. . . FML.

My Zoology Xmas Party Nirvana!

2008-12-08T09:57:00.005Z

So I was at my third annual Zoology Xmas party on Friday and I'm not going to lie, I had the time of my life. I have no REALLY close friends yet in Zoology as such. I know and get on well with lots of people and I am currently forging quite close relationships but they are not yet established. So this essentially means that I'm at this party on my own. So in these circumstances I tend to adopt a persona that isn't completely unlike my own, but it is considerably more drunken, camp and outrageous. It can be fun but I'm not sure why it happens.

So had predrinks in the Zoology department. I hadn't brought any with my but luckily I had a half bottle of M & S champagne in the office that my deskmate had given me due to the fact that she is allergic and I am an alcoholic.

So drank that, with the other postgrads, all female and then we left and arrived at the Gingerman. I immediately got a pint of Bulmers and was deciding who to hang around with. This is my next problem. I don't tend to know who to stand with. I know alot of the 4th years quite well because of UREKA over the summer, and most of them are closer to my age than alot of the postgrads so I do tend to gravitate towards them. So I was beckoned by a girl who knew that I had some gossip about people in the department for whatever reason so I went over and put my hilarious gay bitch hat on. Which was grand. So I had somewhere not to feel socially awkward. It takes about 2.5 drinks until no longer feel strange entering a group of people. So that was fine.

So TJC arrives and isn't sure how to get there. I leave to get him and I see some of the other fourth years heading out. I asked were they leaving... they were just heading to the offo for sneaky naggins.

SUCCESS

So I filled TJC in on everything and we went to the bar, got pints and yager bombs because he clearly needed to catch up. I didn't need to catch up... but I needed a yager bomb so whatever... So we talked to people and shit and TJC found out that 2 of the 4th year girls were into him. Things started to get blurry for me at this point. I mingled for a while and the music started to get louder, so I went to dance with some of the 4th years. They were the easiest to get to. So I camped it up as usual. As far as I am aware I am now the only gay in the village. I think there might be one in 3rd year but that is speculation... More dancing, the Zoology Department Goddess was locked, as she hadn't eaten. We danced obnoxiously as we do at every Xmas party. I gave her the nod and she jumped into my arms and swung back.. clearly attracting attention. FUN TIMES!

A little later, it's rain men came on. I don't really like this song and there are only a few places it is socially acceptable for a gay man o dance to it.

1. If it's a wedding

2. If its a 21st

3. If you are in the country somewhere

4. If you are the only gay person in the building (that you are aware of)

There may be one or two more exceptions, but it is not acceptable to listen to or dance to this song in a gay bar or at some sort of gay/socially progressive event. The same goes for songs like YMCA and possibly "I will survive" but there is a bit more leeway with that one...

So that went down and then some third years with crazy wigs walk in. Clearly as we were making the party happen we needed to figure out how these people came across these wigs and why we weren't wearing them. We were clearly more important... So it turned out that they crashed a private Xmas party across the road that was 80's themed. SUCCESS. So me, and a couple of others (including the possible gay) went over to the thing, wearing the wigs that the other people had stolen in order to look inconspicuous... We partyed there for about 8 songs apparently. I remember two/three. We then decided to go to the bar. We figured out that the Bank of Ireland were at the party so we were all letting on to work for them. I was waving my laser card in the air saying "look, I have a Bank of Ireland Laser card, I work for them". The possible gay was photobombing office pictures too so all in all it was a successful party crash.

Then we left and tried to get al the people to move on somewhere else. We decided to o to Renards because the girls had sore feet. The place is a hole. The dance floor gives the impression of a pit and the bar is a pit within a pit... So we were up on the raised area where you look down on the dance floor (the pit). This woman who looked like a 40 year old lesbian from the early 90's accidently took one of the 4th year's drinks. They mixed up bear and cider so I was like "I'll sort this out" so I went over and tols her what happend go the drink and chatted to her for a while. I have no idea what I spoke to her about but it was all nice and friendly and grand.

So then the party got started and decent music came on. Some of us got up on the tables and started dancing. Which was fun. So then after a while the lesbian comes over to me and is like "erm, could you please leave, this is a private function for cpl and we have this area reserved, your friends are causing a scene, and one of them stole a drink from an individual in our party"

She was foolish to start an arguement with me. I had only broken up with the BF two days previously and I was moving out the following day. I wasn't ncessarily stable. So I told everybody that was with me that I was going to o over there and destroy her. I first had to find out if someone actually did steal her drink, which they hadn't so I went back and had a little chat..

"First of all, I don't understand why you want us to leave, we are clearly making this party happen. Do you not want your company to have fun is that it? You people don't want to have fun? no? Oh and HOW DARE YOU say one of us stole a drink from you, the reason I spoke to you in the first place was because you took one of OUR drinks. HOW DARE YOU (higher pitch). I was personally standing there wen we got these drinks and for you to suggest that we stole your is highly offensive. We can al WELL afford to buy drinks without having to steal any. HOW DARE YOU."

So then she was like, "well maybe I should get security if you aren't willing to ask your friends to leave" So I replied, "there are no signs saying we cannot be here, you go get security and you tell them to talk to me and we will see what happens then."

She left for ages. Eventually she came back... no security... she just stood there giving me evils with one of her work friends. Score one for Jason!

So it was winding down at that point. We went for a dance and TJC decided to leave, I was following and apparently found a group of girls that I decided to stay and dance with... it lasted 1 minute and I followed TJC out. I walked him to the nightlink and then headed back to the flat. He told me he was on the nightlink. I made a Rosín Murphy reference... He didn't get it. But it was fine. Soon he will.

So I popped in my earphones, put Britney on LOUD, and danced obnoxiously with myself all the way back to the flat.

Fun times!

My HELL!

2008-12-05T09:55:00.002Z

So me and the BF broke up on Wednesday. Those drinks promos at pantibar really do have a lot to answer for. I'm just really happy that it didn't end up like this...

My Saturday Morning NIRVANA!!

2008-12-03T11:38:00.005Z

I couldn't think of an appropriate title as neither Hell nor Nirvana actually fit. There was nothing negative about the weekend, but the events that did occur could easily have been a shared dream as opposed to the reality of what happened. So here it goes, one of the most surreal Saturdays of my life.

I had to go to Lucan to collect a "DVD" from the mother. We had all been at Q & A the night before and clearly there was an afterparty and J-red was there so clearly very little sleep was had. I called the mother at 8.30 knowing she had to bring Little A to his triple threat class (singing acting and dancing) sadly Mr. G was not the teacher. . .

The plan was to meet her there an 10, collect the "DVD" and head home. Clearly this is not what happened. So due to various reasons that I will not explain now, J-red came out for the trip to Lucan basically because nobody else could. We got on the bus and went to Lucan. We were a little late because things take so much longer when you are hung over/haven't slept. So we got off the bus and walked down the road to my old secondary school.

Oh isn't it hideous! But anyway, I had tried to call my mother but her phone was off. When we got to the school she wasn't there. So I decided to see if she was at my aunty's house. So then myself and J-red walked the walk that I walked home from school nearly every day for 5 years. Creepy!

On the way I pointed out various landmarks like where some other childhood friends of me live. We then got to my aunty's house... but the mother was not there. We couldn't stop for long because it was one of the coldest mornings of the year so far so we kept moving. We went back to the school again just to check and still no sign of my mother.

So we went for a little walk and decided to write our names in the frosty grass on the green beside the road. J-red also made a frost angel. Fun times were had by all. Did I say we were hung over? I probably meant to say we were still drunk.... Yeah that makes a bit more sense.

Now freezing and a little wet, we decide its time to go into the school something I had been avoiding due to my non-existent sobriety. So we went in and I went to check whether Little A was in his class. Meaning my mother would have to come at some point. He was there along with 2 of my cousins who were in the class and another of my cousins who was teaching the class. So thats 4 family members J-red has seen and one family house so far...

So while we were waiting we did a little tour of the school. We went to see my class picture where I pointed out the people whose houses I had just shown J-red on the wonderful tour of Lucan. We then saw the room I did my Irish oral and the place where I got my Leaving Cert results. Lots of history for 10.30 on a Drunken Saturday morning.

We then admired the "amazing" antibullying work done by the school children an other crap that was on the walls.

So its now about a quarter to 11 and in walks the mother and Big A. I wasn't expecting to see Big A and I was kind of worried how he would react when I had a person who was male with me. You se he hasn't been fantastic with the whole gay thing and it took him ages to get used to the BF but he came around. I was still worried how he would react in this situation though. Turned out he was incredibly nice, friendly and jokey. Who knew!

So when my Mam saw me we both immediately realised that she had forgotten the "DVD" that she was to supposed to have brought me. I kind of knew she would. She said she turned off her phone so work would stop calling her and forgot to turn it back on. I do love the mother. So then I told her that we walked to my Aunty's house. She said that she had been off getting an xmas present for Little A. A bow an Arrow. A Fucking Bow and Arrow. When I heard this I briefly removed myself from the conversation, not shocked but JESUS!

Oh my family and their rediculous and short lived hobbies. They are probably making up for my lack of hobbies as a child. I simply refused to do most things regular. I wanted my weekends for watching cartoons and playing with my friends, not to get shouted at by some middle aged wife beater, who is pretending to be a premier league manager when he is actually dealing with 10 year olds. I just wasn't into it.

So mid conversation the mother gets a call (on Big A's phone) to say that my other aunty will pick up little A and drop him home later. So then we all got into the car, me J-red, Big A and the mother and started driving back to Blanchardstown. On the way out the gate we bump into the aunty that is picking up little A so add another family member to J-reds introduction list. So then we drive past my primary school as seen below.

J-red did comment on how my National school looked like a secondary school and how my secondary school looked like a national school. I never really noticed. So driving home we are all "coversating" in the car about bolox as you do when you are in a car with family and you are all a little drunk. Well the mother wasn't really but she had been drinking the night before. So we dropped Big A off at the Inn and then start driving home. Cue the song "total eclipse of the heart" on the radio for some reason. Hung over, and reminiscing about singstar we decide to hum/lightly sing along.

We get back to Blanch and the mother, very aware that the house is a complete mess, as I haven't been there to clean up in months tells us to stay in the car. In the garden is a powerboat! Another rediculous hobby!

She brings the DVD out and then is nice enough to drive us into town. We talk about Big A's terrible taste in music on the way and have a laugh about the whole situation.

She drops us back, we go to the shop and I make breakfast. its 11.30...

WHAT A MORNING!

My Postgrad NIRVANA!!

2008-10-13T13:59:00.003+01:00

Here it goes, me jumping back on the blog-wagon...

I've been doing my masters for over a week now and I love it! I absolutely love it. Its really interesting and I love the people in my office and I love that I can still do the whole society thing and stuff and I'm just having .... the.... time.... of.... my.... LIFE!

I'm pretty sure I will have a rant or two about the subject of my masters in person or online at some stage over the next few years so I am now going to take the opportunity to tell you all what I'm working on. I'll try to be as interesting as possible.

Toxocara is a worm that normally infects dogs and cats but people can get infected with it too. They can make you go blind or suffer asthma or abdominal pains and some other stuff. So people are interested as it you can prevent some cases of blindness if we figure out the entire story. Thats why my work is important

The general consensus at the moment is that you get it from eating or being in contact with soil that a dog has crapped on. This makes sense because the eggs need mature in the soil before they can effect people. Also, kids that are inclined to eat soil (geophagia, a form of pics where you just put strange shit in your mouth) are more inclined to be infected.

So soil makes sense! But recently there has been work to show that dog hair has loads of eggs in it too. People touch their dogs a whole lot more than they thouch the soil so that could obviously be REALLY important.

The catch here is that not many of the eggs become infective in the dog hair or at least, it hasn't been proven that they get infective.

So I have to sit on the fence until I figure out what the hell is going on! Fun times! I'm living the life of a professional scientist! Now you all know the general background to what I need to do, the ext step is to let me shave some hair off your dog so I can prove it right or wrong?

Please ?

Pretty please?

My Blogging HELL!

2008-10-13T13:50:00.004+01:00

So I haven't really blogged in ages and I suppose that's because I haven't had time nor reason to.

But I have just decided to start again. I sit in an office from 9 to 5 at the moment so I'm pretty sure I can muster up the time from somewhere. I'm sure I personally know everyone who reads this anyway and that they know everything that is going on in my life anyway. If I don't know you I will happily fill you in on whatever you missed out since Galway Bród.

Oh just a brief addition. I live for the UK ever since our trip to Belfast. Everyone is attractve drinks were reasonable, there was choice of music and no shitty drag show. I just wish the crappy bars in Dublin (I'm not talking about Panti Bar because thats perfect) would take note.

Anywho, say hello to more regular posts!

My Galway Pride/Bród NIRVANA!!!!

2008-08-24T19:32:00.008+01:00

Ok first of all, sorry for not blogging in so long. Just haven't really felt the need to..

But after a wonderful Weekend at Galway Bród! I just feel like, I need to tell you all about everything that happened! (from my perspective) I will also provide a list of the most memorable quotes from the weekend and hopefully you will all get a laugh out of some of them at least.

So we started our trip in the flat. Sara and Miiiiichelle came over early enough. I was rushing because I wasn't ready due to an untimely call from the Graduate studies office. The Jew was late because his sleep cycles are screwed up as a result of his cinema job (and his laziness...)

We took a trip to Molloy's as we were all quite worried about the weekend. We didn't know what to expect or whether we would have a good time because the last time we were there everybody hated us... So we went to Molloy's. We though for a while what to drink and decided that the best idea was the good old glens and some boost. (The train was leaving at 2.35 and we did start drinking a little before that so we clearly needed something to keep us awake.)

So Sara approched the cashier and got a litre of glens. Then Miiiiichelle approached the cashier with 5 bottles of boost and requested a bottle of Glens. This resulted in banter and the lady began to walk away after the transaction.... I had to call her back... to get my bottle of glens....

The Jew was still on his way to meet us. He had to go get his bottle of glens of his own...

We headed back to the flat to make our drinks. Once packed we went to the train station making only one chemist stop to get the all important Motilium, everyone's favourite hangover cure!

So we got the train, couldn't get 4 seats together but we were all pretty close and could chat fairly easy. We were tipsey by portarlington and hammered by the time we got off the train. Apart from having "the time of our lifes" on the train, a few other funny things happened. The woman stuck in between us all had a fit of laughter at something we did. The Jew kept apologising for some reason but the woman was clearly loving every minute of her journey!

There was also train security... who didn't care that we were hammered on the train and were dressed like a mix between a bouncer and a spy.

Memorable Moment Number One: Miiiiichelle came out with this gold on the train.

"Jade Goody was told she had Cancer in the Indian Big Brother house where she had gone to prove she had changed her racist ways. She didn't want to tell the other housemates until she told her family...

But the housemates already knew....

*whisper* because they gave it to her.... *whisper*

Now I'm sure all of you know that I think Shilpa is a complete cunt and that she just played on the stupidity of the three idiot girls that ended up being racist towards her. I thought Shilpa was a bitch. I hated her. Not because she was Indian but because her head was stuck up her own arse... but I digress.

We got off the train and get chatting to some knack women who were having a great laugh, as were we coz we were all hammered. We walked over to Eyre square and did a little more drinking and had a toilet break. then we went to the Spanish arch and sat dangelling our legs over the water. Off to a good start.

Due to traffic we eventually met up with our host for the weekend and he brought us to our rooms. The place was like Trinity Halls and it was perfect for what we wanted. We showered and had a few more drinks and headed out. Clearly we were FUCKING HAMMERED at this stage. Miiiiichelle nearly didn't get into da pre-club but I had a word with the bouncer and it actually worked, which was funny considering I was hammered too. Our host was shortly after getting up close and personal with the resident drag queen. He was then quite quickley asked to get down by the bouncer...

We headed to da club then and there was a pole on the dance floor. I took complete advantage of it and monopolised it for most of the time that I was there. There were two people there that I noticed were attractive and one of them gave me the eye.... then the other one did.... Then the two of them got together which I found kind of funny. I was happy enough to play with the pole for a bit but one of them gave me the eye again when they left the stage. After a while though my tiny abb muscles (that I have been trying to increase in size to no avail) began to hurt me so I just left. Miiiiichelle was outside so we taxied home.

Once we got home I tried to get into our rooms but the key wouldn't work. I went to reception and the (attractive) man gave me 6 more... Then I went back to Miiiiichelle and the door wouldn't open again. The Jew then called me and asked me how we hadn't gotten home... we were at the wrong place.... but there all looked identical so we went back anyway, had a few drinks and went to bed...

Sara didn't come home.. she slept in Spideal which was a great source of entertainment for all of us until he did return ...

I woke up at 7.45.... I couldn't sleep and I was hungry so I decided to wake up the whole house... Which I did. They weren't happy at first but then a while later I made breakfast while watching Delia Smith and Gary Rhodes and after a while we had all reached a state of Zen.

One thing we did notice was that it was impossible to get fresh bread in Galway. Complete nightmare. So in anticipation of Sara coming home we were imaging how his trip to Spideal had went. We predicted that we would have said or thought 2 things.

1. "I'm going to use my secret weapon... My Sexuality!"

CENSORED

Sara said both of these things within 3 hours. His walk of shame into the complex was quite funny as he had an amazing see-through parasol that he was failing to hide under (due to its see through nature)

The rest of the day was spent watching trashey television and with me paying Simcity.

Memorable memorable number 2

While watching a film about a troupe of girl scouts from Beverly Hills this line of gold surfaced as an excuse for being late to a court hearing...

"Sorry we're late, we were describing new fall fashions to the blind"

Genius.

Memorable moment number 3

The host was reading the welcome pack.. He said

" OMG guys you can order a babysitter!"

Sara quickly said to the Jew

"Would you like that? yeah"

Another moment of genius

Shortley after we all had an "Emotional Orgasm"

So we all went out that night not half as drunk as we were before. Miiiiichelle had decided not to predrink which was fair enough considering he had finished his bottle of glens the day before. When we went out to da club that night there was fantastic music and a good crowd and a CAN BAR!!! which was fantastic. Never busy and nice and cheap! Wonderfull Idea!

Memorable moment number 4

They started playing camp songs and they played "I'm walking on Sunshine"

Which made us all fall around the place laughing having only seen this video below earlier that day!

We were having a great time. I was a really good night. Those two attractive guys that got off with each other the night before were there together again and once again they were giving me the eye and clearly coming over and dancing beside me which was a wonderful self confidence boost I must say.

We tried to go back to a party with friends of our host. The people having the party were NOT attractive but for some reason all of us would have done one or the other of them which was quite strange, but I did say they I would expect to be thanked afterwards for having lowered my standards.... It was a very obnoxious weekend looks wise. I honestly believe I was one of the most attractive people in the pre club on Saturday night but thats because anyone attractive was already at the club which we quickly learned when we got there. I prefer not being the most attractive person in the place, but try it for 10 minutes sometime, its fun.

We went home then and went to bed pretty quick as everyone knew I would have them up early in the morning so we could get the train!

I was in Galway Having the

TIME OF MY LIFE

My Busy-Body HELL!!!

2008-07-08T12:11:00.003+01:00

So my student card is all faded and the barcode doesn't work anymore. Which is annoying because I need it to get into the gym and possibly get books out of the library, who knows. But anyway, I was in the gym yesterday and usually after a while the card blips through, or they let me in the gate anyway. I was down at the swimming pool and trying for it to blip. There were no worker people around so I had to just wait.

There was a woman there drying her hair. She noticed that it was taking me ages to get through. Then she proceeded to tell me to hold the card further away from the laser. I told her, My card is just wrecked, to which she replied hold it further away.

I held it further away, and then she said it again. She must have expected me to walk back across the room and start randomly waving my card around. She said the same thing about three times when I was trying to get through the barrier, all the time drying her hair, clearly not listening/hearing a word that i was saying. When she was finished drying her hair she said "I was just TRYING to tell you to hold your card further away from the machine. I then said. My card doesn't really work sometimes. Then after another few seconds of trying she said, just climb under. I kept trying because the worker people in the pool area might see me crawling under and then I would have had to deal with that. She then told me to climb under again. So eventually I did. I ignored her as I walked by.

She seemed to be more impatient about the fact that my card wasn't working. Honey, I can stand here and do this as long as I want. Its none of your FUCKING business! Do you really think I don't know how to use a barcode scanner? From the sound of it, SHE didn't know how to use it. I wonder does she stand 2 meters away from the thing, as she directed me. She also failed to realise that this is the second gate that you have to blip through. If I didn't know how to do it, surely i wouldn't have gotten that far. She needs to learn how to mind her own business, and also how to be a little more patient!

The shoe was on the other foot earlier in the gym area. A woman got up on a cross trainer near me and she couldn't get the buttons to work. I told her politely that you have to start walking. She said that she did, and then I said, Oh well, it must actually be broken then. (then she started walking and it worked) But whatever, I suggested once and LISTENED to her and the left well enough alone. SHe smiled at me later on the stairs. I had met her somewhere before but I could not remember where it was. But I digress. Basically, we had a friendly exchange after my input, but I wouldn't even look at that bitch who was dictating to me!

My Interview HELL!

2008-07-07T11:57:00.003+01:00

So I have an interview for a masters on Thursday. I know of a couple of other people going for it and they are all academically similar or better than me. Another aspect of the job will be of a social nature which I trump all the known candidates on which I am happy about. I also thin I have at least as much parasitology experience as the known candidates and more lab experiece than both thanks to this summer.

I'm shitting myself though. I reckon the interview could be what sways it in my direction. I have had a mock with my wonderful supervisor which went well, and he gave me some good tips. So I just need to take these on board and go for it in the interview. I'm preparing questions and doing background reading for the next few days so I should be well prepared. I just hope I don't get too nervous.

A woman on the Ureka recently told me a story about when she once went to an interview that she was quietly confident about. She ended up having to rush there and when she got into the interview she couldn't speak. I would like to thank her for her reassuring words...

But I'm pretty sure that won't happen me. I always come through in the 11th hour (thank you Jack Donaghy).

The most nerve racking thing is the interview situation itself. There are 4 judges or interviewers, 2 of which I know pretty well, which could be a good or a bad thing, and the other two I have no idea about. I assume I will have read something by each of the external interviewers but I'm so bad with names I might forget. But whatever I'll do it and if I get it I'll have a great year next year and if I don't I'm sire I'll still have great year. At least I dont have to walk into a room like this...

My Sister Nirvana!!!!!

2008-07-01T12:26:00.004+01:00

So as you all may know, I have a new baby sister and here she is.

She currently has no name. So for the sake of ease, I have decided to rename all of my sisters.

There are four girls from the Hills and I have four Sisters. I reckon thats how its going to go. SO my system has resulted in the new baby being Called L.C. My oldest sister is now Heidi. The twin that looks like I did when I was a child is now called Whitney and the other twin is now Audrina. These names are sure to stick in my circle of friends but I doubt they will at home, but I can try my best. I'm sure she will look different in a few days, as babies tend to change their looks quite frequently and as of now she does just look like a baby, but she is similar to Heidi and Audrina when they were kids...

My Busyness HELL!

2008-06-25T11:32:00.002+01:00

First of all, I'd like to apologise for the lack of posts over the last while. I had a Big brother one waiting to be posted but I left it too late and now its all outdated. I also have a few other post that have built up over the last while so hopefully I'll have enough time and energy to blog about them now.

I've just pretty much started my summer job and I have been run off my feet but that should begin to wind down now so I'm not too worried. I've spent hours waiting in government offices waiting for peoples PPS numbers and waiting in airports and stuff.

We had our first reception on Monday, the fun finally began, or so I thought. We poured all the drinks an waited for people to drink them, but that didn't happen.... I think two people in the group of 8 had a few glasses and I was left to finish all the other ones that had been poured. It was a little embarrassing. But I'm assured that our Friday reception will be better as the 3rd year zoologists get their results then so we are I will have one a couple more drinking buddies.

We are also hoping to go to the Madonna night on Friday in Spy and apparently if you book a table for 8 or more people you get a free bottle of Champagne. I'm a little afraid to book it in ase people dont actually come. So Anyone interested? Spy? Friday night?

My Big Brother NIRVANA!!!

2008-06-11T13:00:00.008+01:00

Ok so here we go, probably he first of many BB posts. First of all. I love BB, it was the first modern-day TV show that I ever watched and it is still my favourite. Its not silly or pointless or a scientific experiment really. I love watching the bitching and how people form and ruin relationships through back-stabbing and deceit. Its GREAT television. It makes my happy, it makes me angry, it has an effect on me and so it serves its purpose. I have justified a valid reason for watching this program so don't anybody reply and say it's crap. Its only crap when the people are crap and in those situations I stop watching too, but I always give it a chance.

So I'm watching it on youtube coz the flat doesn't have channel for, putting me a day behind TV and 2 days behind real life. Im up to day 4 at the moment so here is my impression so far of each of the people. These are the ones whose names or faces I know. There are loads of them so far and lots are shy for a bit so here are the major players at the moment in no particular order.

Alexandra

Alexandra says she "is not an it girl" she "is IT". To me this echoes everybody's favourite Charile for BB last year and I reckon she will be as rediculous but not half as entertaining. Where are that slutty swim suits? Why isn't she comming onto all the guys. Why is she pretending to have a sore throat? All will be answered at some point. I want her in for a bit to mix things up but so far she is just making me hate her more. I suppose I hated Charlie at the start to. So Alex, just give me a reason to Love to Hate you!

Dale

Dale is a trainee P.E. Teacher who hates kids. Any trainee teacher that admits tht on National television should immediately fail. He is the only attractive guy in the house. Which is why people knows who he is but he hasnt done anything at all memorable yet except for take his top of which, when you have a decent bod, is quite memorable. He wants to fuck someone in the house. Cue generic BB boring "romance"i.e shagging in the pool, blowey in the shallow end, Bj under the covers. The usual.

Dennis

Distantly related to Piggy Corpse blanket form ANTM Cylce 6 or so, Dennis is this years token Gay. He is a professional dancer and is not fat! although illusions might say otherwise for some strange reason. He is walking a fine line between "Hirrarious" and annoying so watch this space.

Darnell

After years of white people trying to be black they come back once agan and show us silly white guys how to do it. He is an albino black guy and on first glance you would expect this to be the only reason for him to be in the house. Although, he seems quite smart and could turn out to either be a scheeming bastard or simply quite entertaining and nice. Lets see what happens.

Lisa

Lisa has a tranny factor of about 5. She is tall, has long hair, a standoffish face if she isnt smiling and is going out with an orange guy pictured below. I quite like her, even though she has had to keep quiet during this wedding crap but I reckon she might get evicted this Friday which I'm not happy about but whatever, there are plenty more fish in the sea.

Mario

Mario's real name is Seán for some reason. He is going out with Lisa, the first couple going into the BB house together. Nice people not very interesting. They have been involved in this Wedding crap for the last few days which has been stressing Mario out but I reckon he could get kicked out this week too. Not sure why, but people don't like older contestants for some reason.

Luke

Is a 20 year old student who doesn't swear or drink or o drugs. He apparently doesn't have a speech impediment but I think I'll be the judge of that. He claimed to only wear suits but the only one I saw him in was too big for him and he has basically done a me and only worm Pyjamas since he got in the house. He is often mistaken for gay. I think he might be. That or Asexual. Until he starts swearing and doing drugs that is, then im sure his sexuality will blossom whatever that may be.

Stephanie

Stephanie is a STUPID BITCH. She is boring. I dont like her. She is Boring. She is stupid. I want her out. She was supposed to pretend to be in a relationship with Mario for the first few days. Mario immediately said, I'm old enough to be your father, and that he would never consider going out with the. I think she took offence to this and decided to make everyone think that he fancied him, which was kind of the point, but she also wanted to make everyone know that she didn't fancy him. She basically wanted to portray him as a dirty old man, which he wasn't. She fancies Dale. No Shit. But dale has said that he doesn't fancy her. But immediately after the relationship being a shame was announced the 2 were in the pool together. (See previous comment on Dale shagging n the house.) She kept telling everyon that she wasnt really into the guy she was suppose to marry. She wouldn't kiss him or sleep in the same bed. She made it out that she was the victim. He was the victim. He had a perfectly attractive down to earh girlfriend why would he want to go out with her? because she is skinny and blonde? Bullshit. Get her out I say so we dont have to bear all the green light moving under the cover bollox.

Mikey

Is blind. That is one of the reasons he got in but I think he is quite entertaining and up for a laugh and is quite harmless and entertaining. Alex was being a total bitch towards him whn he put some other girls underwear on over his clothes at a stag party. This is the Charlie aspect of her personality. (Someone starts an arguement, charlie/alex makes it about her. Overreacts to something that is nothing to do with them. When they are told they are nothing to do with the argument they begin to become violent.) Anyway, I think the dark horse relationship could be between Mikey and this lovely lady below

aka Kathreya or Kat is made in Taiwan. She is Fantastic.I want he to win. She is sooo nice, so genuine, actually funny which is added to by her "Hirrarious" accent. SHe keepts going to the diary room telling them that she has "rearned a new wrord". Its great. She is so funny. I cant wait to see more of her. i just smile when she comes on screen. I rove her hair, i rove her clothes, i rover her personality and I rove her accent!

Kat to win!

My Saturday HELL!

2008-06-10T16:47:00.001+01:00

So last weekend was a busy one and I had a bit of a nightmare day on Saturday which I said that I would explain to alot of you via this blog so here it goes.

So Friday night was Captain Tramps Bday so we went to his place for a surprise party. Watched Big Brother, had a good few Glens, I talked to his Granny, then had some Fat frogs, got a taxi home and went to sleep at about 3 or so. All in all a good night. But drinking so much was a bad idea.

So Saturday begins and I'm still Drunk. I needed to be in the Archaeology Museum at 10 as I'm a volunteering there (Happy Mother?) So i showered and brushed my teeth twice and had some breakfast. I was assured by marktmcc that I didn't smell of drink but as we both smelled of drink we were probably just used to the smell. So I arrive a little early, the museum didn't open until 10 so I sat in the sun observing the weird tourists that go to museums at weird times.

So I go in, introduce myself and start helping out. I was basically helping a woman teach kids about angler fish and then do a little arts and crafts. It was actually good fun. I like talking to kids about zoology. They dont correct you and you have to use simple words. (when I did my 4th year presentation I was told to stop saying "or whatever" and make it a little more formal, well not when speaking to kids are involved)

After lunch we were just looking at things you find on the beach, there were a few specimens there that were cool including a crab with eggs and another with a parasite where the eggs should have been. Cool stuff. But anyway there was Drama.

I told the mother about it and she decided to bring my brother and his friend. Which was fine, but she had to look after my granny this weekend so she had to bring her into town with her. My granny is in a wheelchair and the museum was surprisingly inaccessible. Anyway, she asked one of my Aunts to come in and help her. I assumed that they would bring my granny around the museum while she looked after my bro and his friend, but no. she stayed outside. So that went fine anyway. The mother was the one who put me in contact with this woman from the NaturalHistory museum so she had met her. After the morning thing she had now met my brother and my aunt as well. . .

So when that was finished I got out and the mother asked my to go back to the car with my brother and his friend to charge her phone while she brought my granny to the loo. So I did it, still very hung over. My Nausea HELL! Went back to the mother after and then we went to lunch. Me my brother, his friend, my granny in a wheelchair, and my mother. We went to Mac Donnalds. It was grand. I needed food but it didn't help much. So I was heading back to do the after lunch class thing and this time a different aunt was coming in to look after my brother and his friend while I helping do the class. So now the woman I was volunteering for can meet family member number 4 in the first 4 hours of her meeting me! i was a little embarrassed and still quite hung over, but I didn't look it and apparently didn't smell it, or so my mother told me, which I was happy about.

Anyway I left my mam at 2 and the plan was for her to go shopping with my granny, then get us go to appartment 2 to get my stuff. Then we were going to head home so she could get the present that she had left there for the new baby.

(Note: Afternoon Aunt is now also a granny, but she is my aunt. So my granny, also a great granny hadn't seen the new baby yet, had gotten him a present but forgotten it that morning)

I was going to stay at home, slepp and eat Oxtail soup my favourite hang over cure and she was going to head back over to afternoon aunts place to see the new baby.

This is not what happened.

So the afternoon class ends and we start walking around the museum with the kids. I dont know whats going on. It turns out the plan had changed. The mother didnt go shopping but went home. So me alan and his friend were getting a lift back to afternoon aunts house with her... Im still hungover.

So we do the museum go back to hers all the while, me talking about what im going to do after college and the Lisbon treaty which we were both on different sides of and which she had been misinformed about but i didn't have the energy and just told her its for the best to vote yes.

So we get back to hers. There for 20 minutes and my mam arrives. Then we have to go to my cousins houses, the person who this new baby belongs to, to see the new baby. Fun times we got there the couched were very comfortable and the baby wasn't crying so all was good. But we stayed there for like an hour and a half. So Im like, great, we are finally on our way home. . .

Clearly I was wrong again.

We had to bring the kids to the beach. This was partially my fault as I thought we were going to the beach with the museum person in the afternoon but it turned out she just had beach stuff in different little boxes for the kids to look through so when my bro and his friend were told that they weren't actually going to the beach they got in a huff. Personally i would just have told them no, but my parents cant handle sulking kids so we had to go to the beach then. Im still a little hung-over at this stage. So we go to the beach. I looked around the rock pools at a sand sculpture for about 40 minutes wearing my mothers fleece because I was only wearing shorts and a shirt, not having planned on GOING TO THE BEACH THAT LATE! But eventually we got back in the car, we had to stop off in Thomas street then coz all my stuff was there that I needed for the next day so we didn't end up getting home until 9.30 that night.

That was my Saturday. NEVER AGAIN. It was Hell. If I had have left the family out of the equation it would have been fantastic but shit got complicated. I love them and all but JESUS CHRIST give me a break!

My HELL!

2008-06-01T16:00:00.003+01:00

"Me: Mam, I'm going to head up to my dads tonight or tomorrow because I'm able to get a lift

Mother: But when are you going to clean the dog? You forgot didn't you..."

I immediately went and washed the dog, after doing the dishes that were in the sink that is...

My Blanch HELL!!!!

2008-05-31T13:21:00.002+01:00

Well, I finished my degree. It's all done. Seems I managed to get the balance right between soc stuff and academia. My name is now Jason Devoy Keegan BA (MOD) (Hons).

So Im pretty happy. Im looking forward to a fun summer. The BF got the same and also got an interview for a PhD in Trinity so it's good moods all around!

So the mother gave me a lift home after I got my results. I knew Id be really hung over and public transport doesn't go well in that case, so I thought that she wouldn't mind picking me up. I also had a heavy bag. She didn't seem to but roll on the next few hours.

So anytime im leaving home for a bit I clean my room before I do so I can come back to a clean room. My house is NEVER clean because my mother is unable to clean. She just doesn't know how to do it. She starts doing everything at the same time, which results in a bigger mess and then she gets to tired before she is finished. Im the only one that can make the place look clean but i always get given out to when I do it to my standard because I throw loads of SHIT out and leave all their CRAP in their rooms for them to sort out themselves because I dont know where it should go, clearly they dont either but i do know where they SHOULD NOT go so I suppose I have a little extra information. But whatever

So I come back to my room expecting it to be clean but there are open suit cases all over my floor and my brothers drum kit. there were also tools all over my stairs because they had to change the immersion and water tank when i was gone, so I didn't mind the tools that much. So I get home (after having no sleep the night before due to the zoology BBQ) and have to put all th shit in the cases and back in the attic. Now, I have a system in the attic and everything fits in perfectly when using this system, but in my absence people have not been using this system so everything doesnt fit anymore. This is annoying because I had to clear everything out before,in the process cutting my lifespan due to the amount of fibreglass that went into my skin and lungs, so Im NOT doing that again. This means I have to find a way to fit the m all back in. I couldn't but I got most of them in and hid the smaller cases around the house.

Clean room.... Ahhhhh nice... now I can relax....

So we went out this morning , as a family, to see my brother do a show because his "Sing, Act , Dance" class is at the end of term. They did some shit faux Elvis song and the dance to thriller. Thriller was pretty good. My brother was BY FAR the best male dancer there my cousin was good too but that was because he was just taking the piss out of the entire situation.

So then we went home and I brought my brother roller-blading in the park. It was good fun and there was a hawt topless guy playing football which is always good but I digress...

I get home. Im immediately told to dry he dishes. While doing so I have to listen to the mother Rant about how she has to fit herself into everyone's schedule and from now on will do her own thing... I get it, stop moaning to me, I ask you to do things for me once in a blue moon and I do the same for you, the other 2 do it considerably more so dont be giving out to me! SO then I empty the bin as per request. and go up to my room.

CASES ALL OVER THE FLOOR!!!

The mother was like, oh I dont know why you put them away. To which I quickly replied "they were all over my floor". Then she goes "I needed them brought downstairs, I'm too weak to get them down myself." First of all Bullshit. Second of all take the clothes you need out of them in the attic and then put the cases back. Why do you need to bring them downstairs.

So this is what will actually happen. I will now bring these cases down to her room. She will take one or two things out and then make me carry the cases back up and put them back. She never puts things back in the attic herself. It is a chore but FUCKING HELL all I wasn't to do is come home to a clean room, why does she have to sabotage this all the time. I used to hope to come home to a clean house when I went away with my dad or to the Gaeltacht but I quickly learned this was not a possibility. All I want is a clean room, but it appears the mother wants everybody to live in the mess.

MY HELL!!!!! On the plus side, I wont ever be living her for a prolonged period again so I only have to deal with it a bit. Ill keep my room clean but fuck the rest of it. It aint my problem anymore. I tried for years to make everything have a place but as soon as i did that she kept getting more things. now we actually dont have enough space for everything to have its place.

I GIVE UP.

Im going now to put these suitcases in my Mams room.

Oh dont forget, Im the bad guy in this situation ????

My Summer Nirvana!!!

2008-05-13T15:04:00.005+01:00

So I have decided to have a Jamazing summer, regardless of what happens in the exams. SO this is how I plan to spend my weeks.

Head into work on Mondays at about 11 o'clock, maybe after playing wii in the morning.

Dissect some bees, do some calculations and read some papers. Then I'll entertain the SFI people in anyway that I have to and I'll plan my weekends out with them. I'll go home and play some of the games listed below. Other evenings or mornings I'll head to the gym and try get this HAWT bod I've always wanted. At the very least I want o prevent the weight disaster that was LAST summer. Im going to combat this by gyming, playing wii fit and taking up roller blading in the phoenix park!!! Anyone who wants to join me is quite welcome. Roller blades are so much fun! Anyway, I'll probably be getting hammered for a large portion of it too. You in Lindsay?

Aswell as going on a week holiday to Spain, a couple of weekend trips with the SFI people, I will have to find the time to officially learn to drive. I can drive, its not difficult, but I just need to get good at driving. I've sat in the passenger seat for years making comments and now its time to show them what I can do. If and when I get whatever licence it is you need to drive on your own (I dont understand the whole 1st provisional no, 2nd provisional yes, 3rd provisional no then licence situation) Why are there so many provisionals? but whatever, when I get the one I need, we are totally going on road trips at the weekend to beautiful locations such as Belfast, Cork, maybe Wexford and some warmer areas of Ireland. Anyway, Its going to be Ferosch. I just need to think up a name for my car now... That is most important.

My lack of things HELL!

2008-05-13T14:30:00.004+01:00

So for some reason I'm feeling like I NEED to have a variety of different products. I WANT them and I want them NOW! I dont know why I'm feeling like this. Maybe it is because all I have time to do at the moment is to study and watch a small bit of television but I have HUGE plans for my summer activities. But anyway, these are the things that I want, nay, NEED to be happy... I think I will be happy when I buy them and if I'm not at least I'll have some things.

I WANT

Its an external hard drive and it can hold one terabyte! Yes one whole terabyte! Who needs a terrabyte you say? I do! thats who! Why not? I wont need anoher hard drive for years if I get that! The blue thing is a capacity meter and tells you how much space is left. I h

avnt really put much of a dent in my external hard drive at home which is 500 gigs but I have different plans for this one. I want to instal Windows on it and play all my old PC games that I often get the urge to play but cant because I dont have enough space on my computer. These are the games I WANT to play again.

I dont know why I have the urge to play these games but I do! I just do and I ant to play them NOW! not after my exams, NOW! Tantrum much? but I dont have the time or the money to make this happen.

I also want THIS

But in order to use that I need one of these

So basically i need about €600 in order to make my life complete. Im sure its not much to ask. On the other hand I suppose I should be thankful about everything that I already have. I just found out the other day that I am the proud owner of one of these...

Yes, I am the proud owner of a 1990 Opel Corsa. I probably should be thankfull for all the things I already have. I'm just glad they didn't wheel this out at my 21st. It would have been a perfect parody of my super sweet sixteen if they had. Im a bit excited about learning to drive. But this adds another thing to the list of things I NEED.

INSURANCE.

SO better turn that €600 into about €4600. How can I make that kind of money?

Oh, just to let every know, the BF is on the Game. I am his Pimp. He is expensive coz he is kind of a upper class hooker. Well, not so much high class prostitute, more of a lower middle class prostitute. Either, way he has competitive rates for what you get....

My study NIRVANA!: Animals you will se in hell - the Naked mole rat

2008-05-02T12:47:00.003+01:00

But for the fact that they are incredibly unique animals I'm sure people would never talk about this ugly, terrifying thing that is the naked mole rat, Hetrocephalus glaber.

They say its strange because:

It's eusocial (Like bees it has a queen, but i really think it should have a different name like whore or somehing)
It has a lack of pain sensation in its skin. (I think this is because how painful it must be to have to touch one of these things, they had to become painless to survive, they know how ugly they are!
It in nearly cold-blooded. Call yourself a mammal! You are a witch and nothing else you ugly bastard!

I'm actually just realising a strange theme in m line of study, there was a cartoon in which the pet a guy had was a naked mole rat... what was that cartoon... Kim Possible! Why must she plague my evolutionary research! Well this is what the cartoon looked like, and this is what the real ugly bastards look like....

Why god, why! Here is the proof that all nature isn't beautiful!

My Friday Feeling NIRVANA!!!!!!

2008-05-02T11:07:00.002+01:00

OMGZ!

I am having a great day!

So I start walking into college and its really sunny which is always a good thing.

They guy I worked for last summer is handing in his PhD today which is also a happy occasion. I clearly didn't make enough mistakes to sabotage his project. I spoke to my last years summer supervisor about a project hat she is offering and it sounds fun, fingers crossed. I spoke to my current supervisor about m summer job, and success!

I was in need of a second job over the summer and he has come to the rescue, (on two counts having given me my first job aswell!)

He is going to pay me to finish dissecting all the bees that I didn't get around to dissecting in my 4th year project and if it works out, I could get a publishable paper out if it!!!! So I basically won't have to leave college all summer and I might get a bit of a C.V. boost out of it!

SUCCESS!

My Chairmans dinner Nirvana!

2008-04-30T13:24:00.003+01:00

So a couple of months ago, I was wondering how could I possibly get a ticket to the Chairmans dinner. Its basically part of the Trinity Ball that is really exclusive. Only the most important people in college can go and it's really hard to get into if you are a student. I asked a few questions and immediately found out that it was impossible in my position so I gave up and got a ticket.

So then the Welfare Officer's date cancelled on her in a rude as fuck way. SHe gave him ample opportunity to cancel to her face in a calm and understandable way but instead he decided to tell her over the phone. Anyway, then she was left dateless... So she decided to ask me to have someone fun at the thing. I obviously had to clear this with the BF first and after a convo we sorted it and he let me go! Im soooo happy! Free drink all night, schmoozing with important people, a nice dinner and all in the most obnoxious way. A think its going to be a nice way to say goodbye to y home of the last 4 years!

Cheers Welfare! You have made my ball!

My Something Good NIRVANA!

2008-04-30T13:13:00.004+01:00

So I was out after the LGBT AGM last night. They played this song just before I left. It was amazing. I couldn't dance to it coz there was a sample in it that i remembered but couldnt place. So I immediately left, got home and went on the internet knowing nothing other than the word

" OooooooH I, OooooooH I, OoooooH I Oooooooh I-I-E

Oooooooh I, know that something good is gona happen"

So I typed it in, and up it came straight away! What a fucking amazing song, and whats better, the sample was sampling another song by a musical goddess! Kate Bush! I was soo happy. So here the songs are in chronological order, starting with the Kate Bush one, then the successfull early 90's song that sampled it, followed by the 2008 remix. All fantastic songs.

I do think its time for a Kate Bush revival! That bitch is Fierce! There was a girl in the music room that sounded like her the other day. Because she is so reclusive and strange I suspect it was actually Kate Bush! Nirvana!

My Bon Bon NIRVANA!!!!!!!:My simultaneous having a decent alternative venue to the G Nirvana!

2008-04-24T17:27:00.003+01:00

Oh Dear Lamb of God!!!

So I was in at a new gay night at the HUB last night and it was PERFECT. I've been hating the G for a while now due to their obnoxious prices and Shitty drag show and their basic complete disregard for what people ACTUALLY want. So we get there and it seems to me its only downfall is that its €7 in, but then there are loads of drinks deals so you really dont spend anymore money than you would in the G considering you can spend so much more time dancing.

The music was simply perfect. Three/Four alternative looking DJs swapped all night and they were JAMAZING. Some better then others but ALL good. They basically played fantastic electro playing things like DVNO - Justice, Je Veux tu Voir - Yelle, Because off - Skanty Sandwich you and other songs by Daft punk, M.I.A and Vitalic, but they were just the ones I knew. They played some interesting Chemical brothers remixes and some songs that i recognised and others that I didn't know but were just fantastic. I felt like asking the DJ for a playlist, but that would have been silly.

Interesting people, and some were in costume. We completely owned the dance floor and non-obnoxious dancing was frowned upon. I only have 1 criticism. It was very poorly publicised. They have no online presence so its so difficult to promote personally. There weren't many people there as a result but I reckon as word gets around its going to be the place to be for all those peeps who have been crying out for a decent gay night on Wednesday

In summary, I am NEVER going to the G on a Wednesday again! BON BON all the way!

My Study Purgatory !!!

2008-04-15T11:14:00.005+01:00

So I've started studying and its always at this point that I realise, Oh, I actually love the subject of what I'm studying. It's so interesting. So I'm really getting into it. Anyway our Evolution course was brand new this year and is a heavily online, do it yourself type situation which is pretty cool but I was reading up on Natural Selection and decided to go to the discussion page to see if those Idiot creationists were allowed leave comments on it unlike how us enlightened individuals are able to do on their silly conservapedia.

(Funnily enough they believe in Natural Selection , and that it is an observed process ... I love how much they contradict them selves. Natural Selection IS evolution dear. Believe it coz its TRUE!)

Turns out they can't comment on the Natural selection page but it does direct you to a place of discussion which is nice. But anyway, I saw a comment on vandalism and thought it was strange. I was expecting something along the lines of, God says its wrong, he told me in a dream but this is what I found instead. I just dont know how now would get from Natural selection to Kim Possible.... Well done whoever you were..

"Vandalsim

The last time a read this article some idiot had written something about the new Kim Possible season. If the vandal is reading this, please note that we don't care about Kim Possible and that this page is about NATURAL SELECTION, just in case you haven't noticed that already"

My Final Year Hell!!!

2008-04-14T16:51:00.002+01:00

OK, so I finally started getting myself properly sorted for Finals. I gave myself a much needed panic attack so I know what needs to be done now. I'm hoping I can still scrape a 2-1 at this stage. I reckon it's totally doable. So these are the rules of the next 5 weeks.

I must do AT LEAST 6 hours of Study a day.
I must NOT drink VODKA especially GLENS at any point.
I must do at least some practice questions
I cant stay out past 3 except for T Ball and The LGBT AGM
I can spend no more than 3 hours in total in the Soc room in any one day

If any of of you see me breaking any of these rules you must stop me. Whatever I say make me obey these rules!

My CSC Awards Nirvana!!!!!

2008-04-11T16:35:00.018+01:00

So, Wednesday saw me attending my second CSC awards. The first time I was there, I left in a huff because we didn't win anything. This time was completely different.

We won Best small Society and Best Event! "Success" doesn't aptly describe how happy I feel about this. So whatever, here is how I remember the night.

We arrived and the BF got me a pint. I sat with the zoosoc hotties and we shared a table with BotSoc. Lgbt had a table to themselves coz we always managed to get enou

gh tickets for the whole committee...

The I had a glass of wine on the zoosoc.. Ok two. Then Dorothy got my a double vodka and Red Bull. This was no ordinary vodka, it was GLENS!!!!!!!!! Behind a bar. I should have stopped when I realised that but I didn't. Instead I had 3 more double vodkas and 2 more glasses of wine. So suffice to say i was a little tipsy...

So I was PRing the entire situation all night, Firstly to try get some votes out of people but then I was just doing it coz its fun. So once dinner was over the mingling began. Pictographically here is how the night went

Im presented the award. Im shocked, stunned and delighted. i was sha

king when i accepted that thing. I wasn't really drunk at that stage either. But then the celebrations began.

That is a double vodka in the hand you can see and a glass of red wine in the hand you cant...

So I put my drinks down for two minutes... ie i Drink them and then this starts to happen...

People began to lift me up apparently. Now I remember the second picture but I dont remember the first. I dont now what it was that made people think that they should pick me up but Whatever, I seemed to be enjoying it. The guy in the second picture apparently had a more embarrassing night than I, but I don't remember so he is cool with me. I think I may have refused to score him though.... So get my drinks back and start posing for the paps...

Then I got this wonderful idea of putting the award on my belt...

So then I tried to sober up for like 2 minutes... and we took these pictures!

So clearly I didn't Sober up for long! I was trying to persuade EVERYONE to come to the george, even if someone were wearing a nazi symbol and had a shaved head im sure I would have tried to ask them.

So then I black out, after this very picture. Apparently at this point, I drag Ross into a doorway and start mauling him. Im not into Public Displays of Affection, so this is completely out of character for me. Im kind of embarrassed but whatever! Then I was brought to the G and danced obnoxiously. We left the G, I stormed off away from Ross coz he did something to annoy me and we went home.

FUN TIMES ACCOMPLISHED

My DJ sets NIRVAVA!!!!!

2008-04-06T13:48:00.005+01:00

So this website is going to make my life for the next... I dont know 10 years... I assume thats how long it will take me to get through all the music on it!

Im currently working through a set by Justice. Surprisingly there have been a few sloppy mistakes but who cares when they are playing shit loads of amazing songs!

Just getting to the end of the mix now and its incredibly obnoxious! Goes from Higher State of Consciousness to blue Monday to Rollin' and Scratchin' and then, as I'm writing this very blog ... is that .... no it couldn't be.... yes it is .... its fucking ABBA! Kill me now my life is complete!

My coming out Hell!

2008-04-02T14:00:00.004+01:00

This is not a gay thing, you may be surprised to hear but recently I've been in a few situations where I've had to tell people which college I am from. I'm constantly having to "come out" as being from Trinity! Its a disgrace. If I compare the reactions that I've had from coming out as gay and coming out as from Trinity, the latter is actually worse! (maybe that's because coming out as being from Trinity is practically coming out as gay, but I dont think it is)

I've never sneered when someone told me what college they come from, at least not to their face. I really don't find it an issue! So grow up haters, I shouldn't have to deal with your anorexic issues!

My Taoiseach Hell!

2008-04-02T13:48:00.003+01:00

So he is finally gone! Bertie is gone! And no, its nothing to do with all the bad press that he has been getting recently. Not the fact that he probably sould resign as a result of this things , but its what is best for the people. Whatever, but what worries me is that Brian Cowen will probably take the reins now! How can a man who looks like a vogon be the leader of a country! Looks are important!

Separated at birth????

My Congress Nirvana!!!!

2008-03-29T13:59:00.006Z

So here is a general run down of what went on at congress. I'll be putting more specific posts up too so dont worry. A lot went on!

Get on the bus. Our delegation were on two busses because the big bus broke down. The bus I was then on broke down four times on the way to Bettystown, the other bus had to drop them off and come back for us. Someone isn't getting paid!

So we arrive to be greeted at the door by Cock Eyes. On sight the I'm immediately told that this guy is a wanker. I decide to give him a chance. I get off the bus, he says something annoying and I immediately hated him. So I walk in giving him attitude. Over the course of the week he really lives up to not being liked so it was grand.

I make my way to my room and my roommate got there first and so claimed the double bed. I was fine with it. It was for he best.

So we went for dinner and the chef gives the appearance that he had been in prison most of his life and learned to cook there and these lovely people at this hotel were giving him his second chance. He seemed nice but I had one problem. The dinner was chips and some pork thing with sauce. he put the chips on and then put this other stuff on top of the chips!!!! I dont know if im being strange but I like to see my chips on one side of the plate and my sauce crap on the other! They must not touch! Myself and Frankie were in the same boat here so for the rest of the week we made him put them on different sides. Although on the last day he the sauce managed to make its way underneath the chips touching them all, defeating the purpose. I was annoyed but hey, I got over it.

So we had stuff to do after dinner. There was a mock motion that was just terrible. At least the one at LGBT standing conference is usually funny. But we did that ad had to sit through hours of reports. OH MY GOD! They reports. They were all fairly boring except for one!

This swamp monster made a dreadful report and had a terrible Q & A session afterwards, but that warrants a post all of its own.

So EVENTUALLY, we get out of there and the drinking begins. I brought a Litre of glens... Drank half of it and off I went. I was PRing the fuck out of our delegation and basically ignoring all others. I knew they all hated us anyway. I was used to it from the past 2 standing conferences. We dont seem to care what college anyone comes from, but if you are from trinity they will tell everybody you do, even though you don't! So anyway, Its the first night, I get hammered, go downstairs, have a tequila and two pints of bulmers (after the half bottle of glens) I sit down and I blackout. I didn't KO, I blacked out. This is what I'm told happened afterwards.

I went wandering and found a room made of glass walls!?!
I got my laptop and put on music while swinging it around the room
I fell into a wardrobe when trying to open a door
I fell out of my bathroom while trying to get into my PJ's wearing nothing but my underwear
I was put to bed
A bin was put beside my bed incase i got sick
I got up, Kicked the bin across the room, and Shouted ,I dont get Sick when I drink
I woke up the following morning with no clothes on which is a relatively regular occurrence so I wasn't too worried.

What a night. I also woke up HAMMERED! Me and my roomie had an alka-seltzer. I put on my exec hoodie, put up the hood and put on large sun glasses (Thanks to Biotch). Had breakfast and went to congress. I dont really remember much of it now but it was fairly boring. My roomie got up and just spoke on a motion in Irish, people gasped and I loved it. We were SO obnoxious! As usual we were the most sensible people there. We only spoke when we needed to speak. We didn't have 4 proposers and no opposition. We spoke, well, and briefly and didn't go over time. Everybody else seemed to keep talking until they were shouted over by steering.

In the queue for lunch, Tony the tiger, was talking about one of DIT's motions and how crap it was. Turns out some international BITCH from DIT was standing in front of us. She then says, " I think its terrible that you are voting against things based on the college and not based on the argument. That was a ridiculous thing to say. It wasn't our fault that DIT proposed shit loads of TERRIBLE motions.

That was the first night and the first day. I'll leave it there now so I can try get the rest together.

My Lies Nirvana!

2008-03-29T13:28:00.004Z

First of all, most of the following posts will be about things that happened at congress over the past week. Shit went down and the gossip mills are turning! Fun is most of the "gossip" is actually true.

So here is one of the funniest things that surfaced.

Get this. SO i wasn't going to wont name names, but there it will be kind of obvious to whoever knows the situation who it is. There was one person who went for USI officer board who was RONed. People felt that he hasn't done a good job and as Equality Officer so far and as such he didn't get the opportunity to do it again. Anyone would take this badly but, this person has been particularly childish in the way he has reacted. He has basically ignored my existance because Trinity was mandated to block vote against him. Even if I did want to vote for him, WHICH I DIDN'T I wouldn't have been allowed. So he was beeing a big baby. (A very Big Baby)

SO anyway that isnt the story, the story is he told people the reason that Trinity Block voted to RON him....

Apparently, we voted against him because he has some history with the the President! Apparently they scored about 2 years ago or something and thats why we voted against him. Not because he has nothing to so for his current time in office, not because he has no ability to write motions, but because he has history with the President!

HILARIOUS!

Some three independent sources told the president this. He FREAKED. As anyone would if a fat mess was running around telling people you had scored. And not only was it a once off, but it had happened a couple of times!

HILARIOUS!

So to address this the president approached the person in question and asked for a word. This flustered the person in question but he couldn't really decline. So the president asks, in the most polite and ruthless way, "erm, I heard you have been telling people that we scored. I'm just wondering why you are telling people this when it clearly isn't true." To which the person in question in question replies, "er.... erm.... er... well... I'm pretty sure whoever it was looked like you.. erm.... uh..... er...." To which the president replied. something along the lines of. "well, I'd appreciate if you didn't tell people that it was me that you scored because it is clear now that we havnt."

I Have so much respect for our president. The way he delt with the situation was just hilariously diplomatic, yet HUGELY bitchy. I was, actually, just so happy to be there!

My ex single life Hell!

2008-03-23T02:10:00.003Z

So i was out in Lucan tonight at my Uncles 40th. As many of you know my school life was in Lucan so alot of my friends are from there. Well, tonight I had a blast from the past. Someone I was totally bet into, infatuated with, if you will was there for a moment.

I was sitting in a confined corner. He walked by. I waved, and expected him to walk on but he stopped expectantly. I found this strange because if i were in his shoes i would have walked right out. So i got out of my confined corner and spoke to him for a bit. The conversation ended with him saying, "well, I'm gona go for a piss, see ya later"....

I was like, Ok thank god that never happened. Love certainly is blind! and this guy hasn't improved with age, even though he is still at least 2 years younger than me. He also considers a shit hole of a pub his local. So in general I'm happy. I will always have a soft spot for him and everyone else I had a crush on, but at least now I can see that he is FUG and that I wouldn't touch him with a barge poll, well, unless I was single and desperate, which I was at the time, which may explain the situation in the first place...

My Congress.....?

2008-03-22T19:23:00.005Z

So on Monday I'm going on a week away to the tropical Bettystown....

To discuss the future of USI and stuff... So I'm not really sure what to expect.

It sounds like there is going to be quite a few fun things on, like there is a table quiz and 80's night (my actual Nirvana) and a semiformal gala dinner so I'm thinking Ok, if this video of gala is anything to go by a dinner could be Jamazing!

But the congress part might not be so entertaining.

The motions go from NINE am until NINE pm. Thats 12 hours boys and girls. Standing conference was bad enough! But this is my problem. My problem is the people that get up to talk. Most are incompetent twats with no grasp of the English language and have no idea wh

at they are talking about and are simply getting up to talk for the sake of it. If these assholes didn't need to hear the sound of their own voice this thing would go on for a considerably shorter amount of time. These people similarly have no sense of humour which is a bit if a disaster because you have to laugh when its 7pm and 24 people have lined up to say why we shouldn't support lobbying for free toys for orphans for example.

But anyway, im preparing myself for the worst. Im also getting my costume together for the 80's night. Im either going to gay it up and go as someone from Fame or gay it up and go as a new romantic. Is everyone aware that the 80's were really gay? Im hoping to look like this

Or this

Whichever is easier.... Oh yeah, the politics part will be important too I suppose....

My Parents HELL!!!!!!!!!

2008-03-20T02:10:00.004Z

So I was just downstairs having a glass of wine with the the mother and Big A and it turns out they think I treat the BF like SHIT. Like SHIT. And My Dad actually thinks the same thing too!

I knew that my dad was of this opinion but he never explained why. I got an explanation tonight. I understood where they were coming from but they were WRONG.

Im am Rage.

But anyway, basically it was as a result of my 21st. Apparently i am "The Gay Derek". That is my dads name but I just thought it was a hilarious thing for my mother to say to me so thats why I'm putting a name up (which you may have noticed, I am trying to avoid). Apparently my dad would leave my mother sitting on her own al night and go off and own it. (and maybe there was some light-heavy flirting going on too but hey, that relationship didn't last so whatever)

I can see where she is drawing the similarities. But the mother needs to realise a variety of factors. She and the BF are not the same people. Also the BF was looking after Alison Moyet (his the mother) and probably didn't want to leave her alone.

Also many people at that party were finding out for the first time that I was Gay. Im not a person that goes for public displays of affection anyway and this further deterred me. So I can see why they think I treated him like shit, but if I had the same party tomorrow I wouldn't do it any differently. People need to realise three things.

First of all, I LOVE DANCING. I just stand there close my eyes and go mental, i dont dance with one person all night. I dont do it. I dance in groups, or with certain individuals that are opposite me, closing their eyes and dancing as outrageously! The Bf doesn't have exactly the same sentiment. To force him to join me would be punishment.

Secondly, I was HELLA drunk. I mean wow. Here is how you can tell. One time i went to the bar looking for Yager -bombs but they neither had Yagermeister not Red bull so I got a Tequila and dropped it in half a pint of Bulmers and knocked it back! the next time I went, threw a few fivers at Biatch and said "get me two.... get me two... get me two something" and ran off and danced crazily

Thirdly, It was MY 21st

Whatever, whatever I'll do what I woan!

More importantly, I asked the BF and he says he doesn't think I treat him like shit.

So should we both have a shit time and behave like everyone wants us to behave or should we have a great time and have people think I'm treating him like shit? I cant decide.

My Neighbour Nirvava: BF/Disney's HELL!

2008-03-19T00:51:00.002Z

So I brought the wii over to the flat on Thursday to have some fun. Biatch and Dorothy came over and we played Mario party or something. It was Ok but got pretty boring pretty quickly. The best game we played was in super monkey ball when we had to look like total twats to make the balls roll and jump over hurdles. It was quite successful. So anyway, Dorothy clicked her heels and went home early and Disney had an exam in the morning so me and Biatch and BF stayed in for some "quiet" drinks. So our friend glen came over.... glen's vodka that is. and someone forgot to put the lid back on one of the bottles of ear medicine. So we were loosening up.....

We were then getting in the mood for a bit of a party, and we could hear there was shit going down in number 1. So we tried to devise a clever plan to get in. Eventually we decided to go outside, as they were opening the door, to "have a cigarette". They screamed and invited us in. We immediately accepted.

Choice of music was fantastic so I was happy. It was also very obvious that we were owning it the minute we walked in. Biatch did his usual ice breaker at house parties with lots of new girls....

A walk off

This achieves a number of things.

Everyone sees the ferosh walk
All the girls understand what conversation might be good
Oh, and people are immediately made aware of the fact that we are gay.

(I much prefer this method to, like, on meeting someone saying, "Hi Im Jason, Im was beaten up for being gay in school and I have to go to counselling every week so i dont kill myself ". this isn't actually true its just a reference to those tortured gays again...)

So walk-off accomplished we dance and Biatch Paps and PRs the fuck out of the entire party.

It was "unmitigated success"

We did promise that we were having a party the day after too and said that we would just leave the doors of the apartments open and people could just wander from place to place. It worked quire well, it was good fun and a great way to meet new people without even having to leave your place! but there were one or two potentially disastrous people and the following day there was a broken light in the hall. I m always afraid of electricity so i didn't fix it. I didn't break it and we could easily blame it on the neighbours so who cares. After this 2nd night of partying there is only one thing I could do and that was eat carp and watch the first season of the Hills.

We got a knock on the door from the neighbours asking us did we want to go to a 12 hour disco, which i would have gone to but was simply too hung over. I dont know how they did it, but they impressed me and thats all that matters. Disney doesn't want them to come in on a normal day to watch TV, but I think it would be great to have just the 2 of them over every now and again. Add a sense of community and that....

Thats all i have to say about them so far. Thi opinion could easily change so I will keep you posted.

My finishing college Hell!

2008-03-13T17:31:00.002Z

So, my mam was talking to me a couple of minutes ago and she was like, I was talking to a woman in the Natural History Museum... So I'm thinking wow.. possible job thing coming up here...

Then she says, They are always looking for volunteers to do blah blah blah.... Im like mam, I dont have a job yet. I need to be paid... If I get a proper job I wont be volunteering because i wont have time...

Then she says i was talking to another guy from Outhouse... Im thinking possible job again but no, search for volunteers. If she is going to be on at me all the time Im going to freak! haven't got a job yet, I dont know what I want to do! Give me a break here

But I am thinking of this Natural History Museum business, at least its a foot in the door. I do hate this whole having to work your way up. I did it in School, I did it in college and I did it in my construction career. . . Now i have to start again, going from €0 an hour to €100 takes time! My HELL!

My Zoosoc Nirvana!

2008-03-13T16:04:00.002Z

So I've managed to secure myself two tickets to the csc ball from the wonderful zoosoc. This is good because I need to be the csc ball for a few reasons. Its really fun and really cheap for a ball. Loads of my friends will be there. Its an excuse to get pissed oh and they give out the awards for things such as event of the year, society of the year etc. The LGBT are putting forward Trinity's Next Top Model for event of the year and it could be in with a good chance. It was front page of all the papers afterwards and we raised more money and it looked better in general. Last year we entered the same event, it wasn't as good but it was groundbreaking in it's originality which is why I thought I would *cough* I mean WE would win....

But we didn't. We lost out to MED day... a day that raised loads of money for charity which is always a good thing but I really dont think they should be eligible to win. All the med students have to take the day off to raise this money. We only have about 2 gays around to help out all day and about 15 gays available from 3 o'clock. If we can manage to make €2500 i dont think think it is easily comparable to shit loads of med students helping out all day.

So I need to go this year to accept my *cough* our award if we win, which I think we could considering med day simply CANNOT win two years in a row. If its just a competition to see who can raise the most money thats fine, dont call it event of the year then!

If we dont win that I reckon they might give us one of the society of the year categories.

It is our 25 anniversary and it would be really nice for the csc to celebrate the fact it has been 25 years since they recognised us. Also, we have had quite a strong year for events.

The wine was flowing in the first term and we brought an equal number of peope to Pink Training as UCD and considering they had no cap on the amount they could bring and have considerably more students we did well to have as many. Our Rainbow Week was very strong indeed covering all differents angles that our society should possibly take.

Monday was a protest for all those activist gays of which there are quite a few which saw decent cooperation from other colleges which is quite rare for some reason.

Tueday was TNTM there for all of our Fashion queens, again of which there are lots in trinity.

Wednesday was a fag tag for all those drunken queens.

Thursday was a popular sicence lecture on gay animals for all the science gays of which there are also loads.

Friday was the blue jeans day for all those fuck you gays who just wore jeans and didnt give a shit. Oh and we all went to Q and A too.

There was also a stand in the arts block and hamilton every day and the soc room was open from 12 until 5 every day too. We ran poster campaigns aswell for all the gays all week and everybody knew it was and was talking about Rainbow week!

As it was my job to organise it I am quite proud of its success and i reckon this week could give us the edge in the society of the year competition.

We also had the Wilde ball more recently, just another of the regular big events we are hosting this year organised by the wonderful Dorothy celebrating 25 years of our brilliance.

There still is the AGM to come which is always fun and I reckon we can think of one or two things for trinity term. I'd really love to do the gay oscars. Awards such as campest gesture, catch-phrase of the year, slut of the year, bitch of the year, Bitch Fit of the year, drunk of the year , tranny mess of the year and many more could be a lot of fun. And I really think I can easily think of an award winner for all of those titles. . .

Basically we had a good year. I *cough* I mean We deserve a prize!

CSC, BE NICE! Otherwise we will gey Gay Glen after you!

My ANTM Cycle 10 Nirvana!

2008-03-11T13:23:00.006Z

So Im now up to date with the new cycle of ANTM and I feel a better person for it. This cycle is going to be great. The models are vary goo this year and I cant really see immediately who will be eliminated soon. Well, you kind of can, but less than usual.

My favourite girl is Ciara. Her sob story is that she is a mother and doing all this for her kids which is why she has respect for "hot tranny mess' Dominique who is also a mother. This is Ciara

She is my favourite person because she doesn't go on about the fact that she is a mother (like Dominique) and she doesn't bitch much yet. I do love this bitches but I NEVER want them to win because they dont deserve it. I want this girl to win because she can model and she is nice and she reminds me of Jane Lane for some reason....

I hate Alison and Fatima the most. Alison because she thinks she is better than everyone else when she clearly isn't. I love that Fatima is in it but I hate her a a person. I don't understand how she functions in society. She is from Somalia and her sob story is that she was circumcised as a child which is a terrible thing that everyone pities her for.... to a point. This is Fatima

This is why I love Fatima. She come out with the strangest things and doesn't even realise. In the first or second episode she said something awful to someone and didn't realise, the person told them later and she was like " I didn't realise I could hurt peoples feelings. That's Interesting" she didn't say "I feel terrible for hurting your feelings" but what she said basically came across like "Oh, I can hurt peoples feelings, I can use this as a weapon in the competition" Bitch.

In episode three you really realise what a terrible person she is. She calls Alison the anorexic girl (who is clearly thinner than her) big. Then Alison runs of and starts measuring herself (well done on the editing everyone at ANTM). So they have a fight later when Alison says that Fatima has a big ass and that she "takes it in the back because she is black" (which I honestly think she said for rhyming purposes) but then Fatima gets up on her big black horse and freaks out. Fatima later says things like "you know, I shouldn't have to deal with her anorexic issues" an "she needs to grow up and take responsibility for her own anorexic issues". WHAT THE HELL FATIMA????

This is when it really became clear to me that she was a spaz. Lets recap for a second. Fatima, was circumcised and promised if she won to dedicate her life to stopping this. A noble cause.

Cut to make over day.

Fatima is getting her Weave put in and she says this, and I swear she said it, yes, she a victim of genital mutilation.

getting that weave in "was the most painful thing!"

Not the most painful thing of the day, but the most painful thing ever. Wow, that really emphasises the suffering she went through as a child. Get a grip Fatima. So they give her a weave with big long straight chestnut brown hair and she says i think "it brought out my east Africaness". now, I've never been to east Africa but im pretty sure no natives have flowing straight brown hair. She is a spaz. Enough about her.

Tyra is being a bit of a twat. She refuses to learn how to pronounce one of the girls names, and Tyra mail is soooo annoying. Its on one of those digital things that is too slow to read properly so they all read it out like this

be'...

prepared...

as...

tomorrow...

you...

will...

meet...

with...

the....

judges...

We knew what the sentence said when it got to tomorrow. Bring back Tyra mail.

Still, cant wait for the next episode. What will Fatima unwittingly say next.

"what did I say something?" Oblivous Bitch!

My Guilty pleasure, tranny mess, knack song NIRVANA!

2008-03-11T00:14:00.001Z

My "In Bruges" Purgatory

2008-03-10T11:30:00.004Z

So as I mentioned last week my mam wanted to go and see this film "In Bruges" so we went yesterday. First of all, I have issue with UCI. Its not as good as cineworld, first of all (which is also going downhill by the way) But the thing that annoys me most is the seating. They have two types normal and VIP. VIP cost more and are comfortable. Non-VIPs cost more than cineworld and aren't comfortable at all! They are just crap seats, making you pay more next time so you can have a comfortable seat. Its ridiculous and I think whoever had the idea is a stuck up wanker. I doubt they are making much more money because there are only three rows and they are always assigned seating so they need to pay someone to be there all the time, no general admission sit where you like stuff. but thats enough about that rant, I dont like UCI.

Anyway, the film.

I always get worried going to see Irish things but to be fair this was not bad. I didn't leave thinking it was the best thing I had ever seen but it was pretty entertaining. It was a very different style to anything I had seen before. It was strange. They made a conscious effort say bollox to political correctness in this film and I thought that was great. Im not sure why they did it but they did and it was great. For example one of them says that would be kind of tipping he balance " like a big fat black girl sitting on a see-saw with a midget on the other side."

The crowd did the sort of "oh sit I'm laughing because that was funny but I shouldn't so I'll laugh like this pretending I'm shocked". Racism is completely unacceptable in this day in age, before you hate someone talk to them and if they are an asshole you have every right to hate them, but not everyone else who comes from the same place or whatever its completely ridiculous. Political correctness is also ridiculous. Not being able to say he word "black" in the presence of a black person is clearly bullshit. They are black, thats what its called we are white thats what its called. Nobody is saying anything bad about anyone so you have no right to take offence. If someone calls something gay as in crap in my presence i dont freak out. If they cll someone gay and in homosexual in my presence I dont freak out either. If i think someone is gay I'll say it.

So "In Bruges".....

So every two minutes characters in the film were slagging fat Americans, obnoxious Americans that turn out to be Canadians, Dwarf Americans, and they slag European accents and Irish people too. At one stage one of the main characters(ish) is coked out of it and says that there is going to be a war between the blacks and the whites. Colin Farrel insists he will fight with the blacks because they are obviously going to win, "especially because they have the Vietnamese on their side (which was a kind of a running joke) And Brendan Gleeson says that his wife was black and was killed by a white man so which fucking side should he be on! So basically the film wasnt racist, it was politically incorrect and I loved it for it.

The story was good and funny. It was nothing too heavy in parts until near the end. I wont say anything else about the story but I kind of knew exactly how it would end(ish) about 10 minutes before. What I thought was going to happen did but so di a few other heavy things so it was all good. I thought it ended well. When we were leaving some girl was saying "ahh, that ending was shit" and i nearly turned around and hit her because it was a good ending and I would have been really pissed if it had ended another way and its her fault I have to endure so many shit endings to films just because she cant handle a bit of ambiguity in the ending. It doesnt always have to end in a neat little package BITCH!

So there you go. I enjoied it. It wasn't very exciting or taxing but it was good and I would recomend seeing it if you have nothing better to do.

My Ferocia Hot Tranny Mess Nirvana!

2008-03-09T16:25:00.001Z

My Marriot Nirvana!

2008-03-09T12:28:00.003Z

So I was at a family dinner thing last night in Ashbourne. Gorgeous hotel, nice food, nice building, oh and HAWT bar staff. We walked into the bar, and immediately I saw 3 staff members that I would totally do. To be honest I think it was the uniform.

It was basically a black t-shirt, but whatever shape it was it made all the guys arms look HAWT. It added a bit of excitement to the evening. We went for a drink before the meal and then left the bar for the restaurant where there was an ALL FEMALE Staff. I was disgusted, but luckily one of the hot ones kept coming in, totally giving me the eye. . . or whatever

They all seemed really gay too. Maybe it was just because they were wearing gay t-shirst I dont know but my Gaydar is usually flawless...

My Wilde Ball Nirvana - Holy Bannana, what a night!

2008-03-06T11:42:00.004Z

So as many of you know, the 2nd annual Wilde Ball was on last night and good times were had by all as far as I know. It was a huge improvement on last year and I reckon with the success we had this time, we will potentially be able to make this a really good annual event.

I think its major high points were the relatively high profile guests, the exhibition the venue oh, and the sheer amount of wine that there was. We actually have some left over which is unheard of at LGBT events and everyone as far as I could see was hammered.

We finally gave the open heart house their money and have all been invited out some day to see what they do. I was convinced already but I suppose we should pop out for a chat and stuff.

There is some goss from the night. I made at least two faux pas's. Firstly I mixed up two ladies and asked someone where was someone she had never met, but I was hammered so she let it go. The next thing I did to Dorothy's disgust was call Senator Norris David. I just said

"Cheers David, thanks for coming"

I dont think he had a problem with it and I only l it was a faux pas when Dorothy reminded me. I did kick myself a little afterwards but to be fair I simply called him by his name so I dont see what the problem is. I blame Zoology. We are all on first name terms with everyone around here. Apparently one lecturer used to insist on being called professor but, for some reason he didn't last very long...

So anyway, I walked back to college with "little black dress and hooker boots number 2" and gave out about none of the tortured gays coming tonight. I dont understand why they refuse to come to our events. Apparently they just couldn't have been bothered! We brought about 12 people out to HELL to go to their shitty thing, and they slagged us when we got there. We were offering nice surroundings and shit loads of free wine, and its on their way to their precious G. But whatever, I'm over it. They are now Officially DEAD to me. They really need to get over themselves.

So, back to the scandal, we got to the G, I did some dancing, and eventually decided to leave. On my way out the door, "Little black dress and hooker boots number 1" was scoring "Little black dress and hooker boots number 2". In the most high traffic area of the G! I know Little black dress and hooker boots number 2 has a GF so that was slightly unexpected but she had been all over little black dress and hooker boots number 1 all night.

Number 4 was also hammered. More hammered than I have seen him yet. Ok he onyl started drinking about 3-4 weeks ago, but its a slippery slope. Why do we turn everyone we meet int alcoholics? I nearly need a liver transplant after the "summa", we did that much drinking...

More Shit happened, but Its not my pace to blog about it. Suffice to say someone threw a drink in someone else face. But to be fair the first someone was HAMMERED and the second someone didn't really mind. To end, Juno was there, and she has given inspiration for another song, that will be entitled Holy Banana. Its going to be just Jamazing!

My tortured soul HELL!

2008-03-05T10:33:00.005Z

I really hate when people use serious PERSONAL issues that they may have as an excuse for not doing something. I will happily accept from most people an excuse something like:

"Oh I cant make it tonight, sorry, I have a family thing"

Instead of,

"I'm really sorry I cant make it but half my family just died in a horrific car crash/chemical spill and I have to go to the morgue and identify the bodies, but next time maybe, yeah?"

It is not cool, especially if you dont know them that well. It makes everyone involved feel uncomfortable. Fair enough if you need to explain in an official capacity to work or college or something but I dont need a good excuse for not going to the G on a Wednesday or something.

Sorry, I wont be able to blog later because I was kidnapped and some guy broke all my fingers off before force feeeding me them, but hey, maybe they will grow back and I can blog then...

NOT COOL!

This post was inspired by one of those "tortured gays" - My life is so crappy because I'm gay... Well do what the rest of us do and have a good time instead of whinging about nothing.

People dont dislike you because you are gay, people dislike you because you are annoying.

My Zoo Soc Nirvana!

2008-03-03T16:02:00.004Z

They want to put this picture in the prospectus for next year! I look good in it which is strange for me. Even that fierce Colombian bitch said the camera doesn't love me and he never has a negative thing to say about anyone but I have accepted it. This one s grand though.

My Title Nirvana!

2008-03-03T14:08:00.002Z

So, I'm in a good mood now coz I got my draft thesis back. Everybody else is freaked out but because I have a fierce supervisor mine is nearly finished. There was nothing huge to add or take out. So in general the draft was "ass-ep-table" which I'm quite happy about.

All I have to do now is make it Jamazing. We were talking about stuff and the last thing I thought of was the title. So he my supervisor was like, you can be a bit fun with the title, go a bit out side the box and stuff. So Im like, YES! I want to do this NOW! So he suggests going for something like "Size Matters!: Why bigger is better for groups of captive Bumble Bees". Im going to go with something like that. I'll totally be channing the whole class with I title like that so Im pretty excited. i'll be walking around on Friday like a total Zaha, channing peoples titles left right and centre!

Success!

My parenting HELL!

2008-03-02T13:05:00.001Z

I was just showing little A pictures of my 21st coz he was in a few of them. Then he sees this picture of me sandwiched between Heidi and Cashmac. So he says,

"ahhh sick!

Are you gay? ahh sick"

I neither denied nor confirmed this, but I did say lots of my friends are. to which he replied "Oh" and forgot about it immediately.

What do you say to your eight year old brother when he asks you that question? I would happily have said yes, but I dont know what the mother and Big A would think about it! My parenting HELL!

My Mothers Day HELL!

2008-03-02T11:09:00.003Z

So I came home this weekend with the intention of spending some time with the mother as it is mothers day. She wanted to go and see some film with Colin Farrell today about Belgium or something, which sounded shit, but I was totally up for it. So, turns out this film isn't out until Friday, so that was that out the window but I thought we could go to the shopping centre and spend some quality shopping time together.

Instead this is what happened. I got up too late to make her the traditional mothers day breakfast in bed, so I just offered to make her a cup of tea, which she loves for some reason (not tea itself, just the offer of tea). Then we watched the golden girls for a bit, which was fantastic.

So then Big A came in after being away on Brokeback over night (Him and a friend have a horse each that they keep in a field up the mountains. They go horse riding, drinking and sleep in a caravan. You can see the obvious similarities with the film, hence me and the mother refer to him being away on Brokeback) and he was freaked coz his friend had crashed into his car and he didnt even say sorry! So then he says to me, "will you go over to the shop and get me a bottle of wine".

Now there were two problems with that request. Firstly he was dressed and awake, I was in my pyjamas and had just gotten up, why the Hell should I have to go to the Shop. Second of all, it was 10.15 on a Sunday and you cant buy drink at that time (So I didnt have to go to the shop in the end. SUCCESS) So I told him about the legal impossibility of me being able to fulfill that request to which he replied, "these ridiculous new laws". Now, as far as I was aware this has been the law for quite some time now, but I let it slide because I know what its like when you cant get a bottle of wine when you need one, so i felt a little sorry for him.

So then Im thinking, cool, he can stay here and look after little A while me and the mother go up for some shopping. This is not what happened. He decides that he is going up to the Inn (a pub where he has been a regular since the age of 10). So the mother offers to give him a lift up and while he was in the inn she would go for swim and a sun-bed. Big A asked me if I'd like to accompany him, an offer that I had to decline. I had just gotten up, I was wearing my pyjamas, hadn't had breakfast and I didn't want to break my self imposed 3 o'clock rule preventing me from drinking before 3 unless it is a special occasion. I didn't feel Sunday justified special so I had to say "sexy no no no".

So that left me in the house on my own waiting for little A to come home from the sleep-over that he was at the night before.

I just got the feeling everyone in the house was like "whateva, whateva, I do what i woun"

My First Blog HELL!

2008-03-01T20:22:00.000Z

I don't know what to say or what the rules of blogging are yet so before I start naming names telling secrets and bitching about people I hate, I'll find that all out.

Also, just to warn you all, expect a lot of spelling mistakes. I can't spell, especially when I'm on a typing rant.